How an Unhealthy Relationship Can Affect Your Health

If you live with a partner who hurts, scares, or controls you, you may also be dealing with headaches, back pain, or stomach trouble that keeps coming back. It can be hard to see the connection, but what happens at home can take a real toll on your body and mind over time.

You are far from alone in this. More than 1 in 3 women and more than 1 in 6 men in the U.S. have experienced physical violence, sexual violence, or stalking by a partner, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

If any of this sounds familiar, you deserve care for your whole self. Help is available, and you can take it one step at a time.

Key Takeaways

• Abuse can be physical, emotional, sexual, or financial. Controlling behavior counts too.
• Over time, abuse is linked to chronic pain, high blood pressure, stomach problems, depression, and anxiety.
• Emotional abuse is linked to many of the same health problems as physical abuse.
• Your care team at Peach Tree Health can help with your health concerns and connect you with support.
• Free help is available 24 hours a day through the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

What Abuse Can Look Like

Abuse can include hitting or other physical harm. It can also look like:

• Name-calling, threats, or constant put-downs
• Controlling your money or keeping you from working
• Checking your phone or tracking where you go
• Keeping you away from friends, family, or medical appointments
• Pressuring or forcing you into sexual activity

In smaller communities, the nearest friend or family member may live miles away. That can make it easier for a partner to keep you isolated.

How Abuse Can Affect Your Body

Living with fear or tension keeps your body’s stress response turned on. Over months and years, that stress can wear down your health.

Research links abuse from a partner to health problems like these, according to a report from the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine:

• Chronic pain, including back pain and neck pain
• High blood pressure and heart problems
• Stomach ulcers and other digestive problems
• Headaches, fainting, or other nerve and brain problems
• Pelvic pain, bladder infections, and other reproductive health concerns

Emotional abuse matters too. The same report notes that emotional abuse is linked to many of the same health problems as physical abuse, including high blood pressure and diabetes.

How Abuse Can Affect Your Mind

Abuse can also affect how you think, sleep, and cope from day to day. If you’ve experienced abuse, you may be more likely to have:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which can cause nightmares, flashbacks, or feeling on edge

You might find yourself using alcohol, tobacco, or drugs to get through hard days. The CDC notes that people who have experienced abuse from a partner are at higher risk for smoking and heavy drinking. These are common ways to cope with ongoing stress, and there is help for them too.

Why the Connection Can Be Hard to See

Health problems linked to abuse often build up slowly. You may be focused on getting through each day or keeping your children safe. You may also feel embarrassed, afraid, or unsure whether what you are going through “counts.”

Whatever you are experiencing, your health concerns are real, and they deserve attention.

Talking With Your Care Team

Reaching out can feel like a big step, especially when so much in your life feels out of your control. Many health care providers ask everyone a few questions about safety at home as part of routine care. You can share as much or as little as you want. If you have questions about privacy, you can ask your provider how your information is handled before you share details.

At Peach Tree Health, your compassionate care team can help with:

• Everyday health care. Our family medicine providers can help with pain, blood pressure, and other health concerns.
• Women’s health care. You can get help with pelvic pain, bladder infections, and other reproductive health concerns through our women’s health services.
• Emotional support. Our behavioral health team offers therapy for adults and children, in person, by video, or by phone.
• Help with basic needs. Our Community Health team can connect you with resources for housing, transportation, and food.

If You Need Help Now

If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

For free, confidential support any time of day:

• National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1-800-799-7233, text START to 88788, or chat online at thehotline.org. Advocates can also connect you with programs in Butte and Sacramento counties.
• Yuba and Sutter (and Colusa) counties: Casa de Esperanza — a domestic violence shelter in Yuba City — offers a 24-hour crisis line at (530) 674-2040.

If you think someone checks your phone or computer, try using a device they cannot access, like a friend’s phone or a library computer. The hotline’s website also has tips for browsing more safely.

At Peach Tree Health, We’re Here for You

Your health and safety matter. To make an appointment, call (530) 749-3242 in Yuba and Sutter counties or (916) 779-7656 in North Sacramento. You can also find a Peach Tree Health location near you.

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