How to Recognize the Warning Signs and Help Someone Who Is Struggling
You don’t need special training to help someone who may be thinking about suicide. Most of the time, the people who notice first are the ones who already know them best: a parent, a coworker, a neighbor, a friend.
If you’ve noticed a change in someone you care about and you’re worried they might be struggling with suicidal thoughts, here’s what to look for and how to help.
Key Takeaways
- Watch for changes, not just a single sign: Hopelessness, withdrawal, and shifts in sleep or mood are worth paying attention to together.
- A direct question helps, it doesn’t harm: Research shows that asking someone if they’re thinking about suicide does not increase their risk.
- 988 is available anytime: Call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline day or night, free and confidential.
- Local, affordable care exists: Peach Tree Health’s behavioral health team serves Yuba, Sutter, Butte, and Sacramento counties, accepts both Medi-Cal and private insurance, and offers a sliding fee scale for those who qualify.
Warning Signs to Watch For
Suicidal thoughts don’t always look the way people expect. Some signs are quiet changes over time, and others show up more suddenly. Watch for:
- Talking about feeling hopeless, trapped, or like a burden to others
- Withdrawing from friends, family, or activities they used to enjoy
- Sudden changes in sleep, appetite, or energy
- Giving away belongings or tying up loose ends
- Increased use of alcohol or drugs
- A noticeable shift in mood, especially a sudden sense of calm after a period of depression
One sign on its own doesn’t always mean something is seriously wrong. A combination of several, especially if they’re new or getting worse, is worth paying attention to.
How to Start the Conversation
Bringing it up can feel uncomfortable, but a direct, caring question is one of the most helpful things you can do. Try something simple:
- “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed like yourself lately. How are you really doing?”
- “Are you thinking about suicide?”
Ask calmly, listen without judgment, and give them space to answer honestly. You don’t need the right words. Showing up and paying attention go a long way.
A Common Myth, Cleared Up
Many people worry that asking about suicide will put the idea in someone’s head. A review of the published research on this question found the opposite: asking directly does not increase risk, in adults or adolescents. It often provides relief, because it tells the person someone has noticed and cares enough to ask.
What to Do Next
If someone tells you they’re thinking about suicide, or you believe they may be at risk:
- Stay with them, or make sure they’re not alone, if the situation feels urgent
- Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7 and confidential
- If you’re in Sutter or Yuba county, contact Mobile Crisis Response for in-person support
- If you’re in Sacramento County, visit the Mental Health Urgent Care Community Clinic for walk-in crisis support
You don’t have to handle this alone either. Crisis counselors, therapists, and doctors are trained to help you support someone through this.
Support Close to Home
Peach Tree Health offers behavioral health services across Yuba, Sutter, and Sacramento counties, including individual therapy, group therapy, and psychiatric medication support for ages 5 and up. Services are available in person, by phone, or by video, and a sliding fee scale makes care accessible regardless of income or insurance status.
For ongoing support once the immediate crisis has passed, therapy can help address the underlying issues and concerns behind it, though it isn’t a substitute for crisis care in the moment. To build a relationship with a provider, contact us. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a last resort.
More to Read
Mental Health Month: Breaking the Stigma and Embracing Wellness
Nurturing Your Mind: A Guide to Prioritizing Mental Health and Wellbeing
Understanding Suicide Awareness: Shedding Light on the Numbers